I hold January in contempt, and it’s a month I often refer to as ‘Soul Destroying’ as there is really no other way to describe it. I wish I could somehow bypass it or sleep through it, but No…I have to deal with yet another shattering anniversary.
Another year without my beautiful and youngest son Alex.
Alex and I used to celebrate our birthdays together as we were 3 days apart.
But since that fateful day in 2013, life as I know it just isn’t the same nor will it ever be the same.
I am now left to celebrate his birth but what was once my own birthday now holds so much unimaginable pain and is instead referred to as Mother/Son day.
The day our world’s changed.
January brings me a lot of anxiety as THAT date will soon be upon us and how do I deal with this again?
Friends and family try as they may but are respectful in allowing me to cope the best way I can.
We all handle January in our own way and the best way we can with no right or wrong way.
This is my life now and I promised Alex ‘You will never Walk Alone’
The hole in my heart gets bigger as the years now pass.
I’m a grief-stricken mother and I always will be BUT through Alex, my strength is to remind you all
YOU matter, never let your safety be compromised by inadequacies
You are all worth the Save!!
And this is why I share the pain of my loss.
